*laughs at the charming innocence*
Truth is, I've heard that one a while ago. It's still funny...but slightly used.
*...things that go bump in the night...*
Its a funny joke, dammit. It has a charming innocence about it. Appreciate the charming innocence, you bastards... [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]
*laughs at the charming innocence*
Truth is, I've heard that one a while ago. It's still funny...but slightly used.
...he of the gross jokes...this is for you:
...so this really old couple decided that, despite their advanced age, they wanted to have a baby. They went to their doctor and he assured them that, indeed, in this day an age, it was quite possible for even persons of their age to have children. However, he would have to do some tests. He gave the old man a bottle of viagra, and told him to take one, then to 'pleasure' himself and save his seed so that it could be tested for fertility.
A few days later, the old couple returned to the doctor's office. "Well, doc" said the old man, "I tried with my right hand...then I tried with my left hand...then, I tried with both hands, before I gave up. So my wife here tried. She tried with her right hand...and she tried with her left hand...she even tried with both hands! So she tried with her teeth in...and she tried with her teeth out...but no matter what...we couldn't get that damn cap off the pill bottle!"
She went down on a pill bottle? Interesting. [img]wink.gif[/img]
[img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img] Philosophy 101: What's the sound of one hand bitch-slapping you?
Nice. Not gross, but funny.
This is gross:
An elderly woman goes to her OBGYN for the first time in over a decade seeking treatment for an apparent infestation of pubic lice. Naturally, the doctor asks if she's been sexually active. She blushes, but insists that in all her years she's been happy to remain a virgin. Unconvinced, the doctor practices his art, and makes a startling discovery.
"Ma'am," he says, "those aren't lice. They're fruit flies - your cherry's rotten."
Little Johnny wanders into the washroom and catches Mom in the tub. he points to her crotch and says "Mommy, what's that?"
Mom, in a fit of embarrassment says "umm...that's where Daddy hit me with the axe."
Johnny replies, "pretty good shot, he got you right in the cunt."
[img]eek.gif[/img]
You want gross? I told this one before but it's still a laugher.
This guy's co-worker asks him if he wants to go out tonight. He says no because his wife get's mad when he comes home late. "No problem", says his co-worker "when you get home tonight just sneak into her bed while she's asleep and give her the best oral sex she's ever had! She'll forgive you!"
So after staying out late with his buddy the guy carefully sneaks into the house in the dark, up the stairs and into his wife's bed. Then he proceeds to go down on his wife and give her the best tongue job he can. She moans in shear joy and comes to an incredible orgasm. Figuring all was forgiven, the guy gets up and heads to the bathroom. He turns on the light and is quite surprise to see his wife already sitting on the toilet!
"How did you get in here so fast?", he exclaimed.
"Shhhhhhh!!!", she said "you'll wake my mother! She's sleeping in our room tonight!"
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">WAP-WAP-WAPOriginally posted by -Dark Angel-:
[img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img] Philosophy 101: What's the sound of one hand bitch-slapping you?
Posting Permissions
Bookmarks